No. 38: Edible Insults en Français
As I soldiered on with my intensive French course today, le prof decided to liven things up by presenting us with a list of insults / reprimands en Français. He taught us some good ones and they are so yummy, I just had to share them with you!
…in keeping with the food theme of last week’s French idioms, all of these insolent phrases continue to pay homage to France’s love of, and connection to, food.
Amusez-vous!
Say for example, you are angry with someone, and you want to be more descriptive than simply calling him/her an idiot, you could say instead:
Espèce d’andouille! (You) piece of sausage!
Une vraie courge! Â (What) an utter squash!
Quelle nouille! Â What a noodle!
Quelle poire! What a pear!
 If you want to tell someone to go where the sun don’t shine, you could say:
Va te faire cuire un Å“uf! Go cook yourself an egg! (Go to hell!)
Want to tell someone to mind his own beeswax? Try this gem:
Occupe-toi de tes oignons!! Mind your own onions!
If you think your colleague is one twist short of a slinky, you might tell your boss:
Elle travaille de la cafetièr. She’s working from her coffee pot!
OR
Elle pédale dans la choucroute!. She pedals in the sauerkraut!
If you want to criticize a person’s looks you can handily compare them to some common food. For example, you could tell a woman:
Vous avez deux oeufs sur le plat. You have two fried eggs on the plate. (You’re flat-chested.)
Think someone’s ears are too big? Try:
Vous avez des oreilles en chou-fleur. You have ears made of cauliflowers.
Have a friend who has become a bit pudgy around the middle? How about comparing him to a breakfast bun?
Il a de la brioche. He has some brioche. (a potbelly)
Do you have a friend who is much taller than the average? You could always call him:
Une grande asperge. A big asparagus.
Oh, I love this tricky and vivid language! Please let me know if you have come across any other charming food-related insults (and if I have made any mistakes).
Vocabulaire
Amusez-vous! Enjoy! / Have fun!
en Français: in French
le prof: the teacher (short for le professeur-informal)
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365+ Things I Love About France 
There are some good ones there.
On Mon, Nov 4, 2013 at 4:52 PM, 365 Things I Love About France wrote:
> 365thingsiloveaboutfrance.com posted: “As I soldiered on with my > intensive French course today, le prof decided to liven things up by > presenting us with a list of insults / reprimands en Français. He taught us > some good ones and they are so yummy, I just had to share them with you! > …in keep”
French idioms are the funniest. My favorite is “vachement chouette” literally meaning cowly owl…but used in common vernacular as “really cool.” 🙂
Thanks! I’ve never heard that one. Though the French seem to have a lot of sayings involving cows. Maybe I should do a post on cow and animal idioms? C’est une bonne idée..
I would read it! Another good one is “poser un lapin” to stand someone up, as in a date.
Love it! Keep ’em coming…
Thank you! It’s a bit difficult for me to think of them because when I think in French the idioms just sound like naturalized speech; I don’t necessarily seem them as idioms. But I will absolutely keep thinking and report back to you! You’re taking French lessons right now?
Yes. I’m really making a good effort to learn French this year. I love language, but my old brain is hard to retrain, oh, and French is so hard to pronounce…but I am getting better.The beauty of language and turning/or discovering the perfect phrase, brings me a lot of joy. You are French, oui? I look forward to hearing more of your fabulous phrases.
Actually, I’m American, but I went to a French language school 🙂 I followed to keep up to date with your learning!